Save Me From Myself

The peaceful look on corpses reminds me life isn't a gift,

I don't know what it'll take you to know,

that it isn't me that you talk to everyday.

I hear your voice from the inside

but I can't even shout


because he looks like me.

And he behaves like me.

Moves like me,

Acts like he loves,

Acts like he can't hate,

Smiles like he's full of life,

Laughs like there isn't any tomorrow,

Stares with those big, brown eyes.

But it isn't me.

He lied when he told you I was numb.

Fuck it...

I feel things down here,

Things I'm not supposed to,

I feel emotions that drip acid into my veins.

I'm dying from the inside,

And I can't get you to see my pain.

He lied when he said I'm fine,

My hallways are haunted by loneliness

that made my demons commit suicide.

Pain reminds me I'm alive,

Prose and poetry a constant reminder of the things I lost,

Ever since this beast took control,

I write about nonsensical things,

Like the sound of my demented music coming from my car stereo.

While he...sigh...he just writes paragraphs of motivation and love...

And the real me is crying,

That you can't notice that that isn't me,

It isn't me.

I'm broken.

I'm shattered.

He acts.

He feels nothing.

The peaceful look on corpses reminds me life isn't a gift,

The bitter taste of his beer reminds me of a mourning life.

He smokes to his rhythms and songs,

And that's just choking me from the inside.

Obviously you don't know how it feels like,

When you don't know how to take back,

Control of your body and your mind,

He's sleeping because reality is a nightmare.

I'm writing like it's a compulsive disorder.

He's hurting me like there's more to break.

I'm fighting him like there's a victory to be achieved.

He's laughing every day,

I'm dying every day,

Like it's a state of living instead of a destination.

I don't even know if you'll get what I'm saying,

Or you'll just hear moans and screams,

As I try to explain,

Why it's like this,

You know dead...

I have tried...

I have tried...

But the batteries are just dead,

So I tried to touch the buzzes,

From the wires above me,

And I was surprised,

At the power,

At the feel.

But I lost what made me me.

So when I thought this new me.

With enlightened thought process,

Would tug at the edges of your ice cold heart,

I guess I was wrong.

You'll never like what is useless,

And in this case,

A wild case like mine.

I hope he doesn't wake up earlier than you and finds this.

And if you do...

Please save me from myself...

Before he wins,

And he flushes me out,

Like poop.


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